Job Daze

It was strange to be working again, because of this and that I hadn't had a job for over a year. Boy did working again hit me like a ton of bricks!

It was seven o'clock, not the nice seven o'clock when you meet people for dinner or drinks its evil morning twin that I had completely forgotten about took me by surprise. My alarm was ringing and I was distraught I didn't want to be awake yet, I could feel the warmth of my sheets, I was under a cosy sleepy malaise. I panicked what could I do, I had to get up for work, but I wanted to sleep more.

SNOOZE. Holly mother of God! I had forgotten about the snooze button, the thought of the snooze button united ever fiber of my body as it resonated to a truly great feature of human engineering at its very best. Yeah the Egyptians built some giant triangles, the Chinese put some bricks down in a line, but the snooze button rocks way more than they do! Elated I pressed it and settled down for another glorious 9 minutes of sleep. Having been removed form this habit for a while I was surprisingly aware of the internal negation that went on during this time.

Ring Ring ... I don't need to shave, and why brush my teeth I haven't eating anything in hours
9 minutes later

Ring Ring ... I don't need a shower I had one yesterday.
9 minutes later

Ring Ring ... Breakfast? The most important meal of the day? Not today pal.

Seriously can you imagine skipping any other meal like that.

'Michael dinners ready'

'Don't worry about it I'm just going to sleep for 9 minutes instead'

But anyway its was my second day and by lunch time the novelty of being at work again had worn off and I was bored, really bored. I had promised myself I was going to actually work this time round. I had perfected slacking off while appearing productive to such a degree that I would normally do less than an hours actual work a day in my prime. I once spent two weeks doing nothing but playing Tetris, I enjoyed my brief stint as a profession Tetris player, far more than the high pressure week I spent trying to complete Spider Solitaire on hard.

I had promised myself to reform, but well this job was dull and the Internet is interesting. Working doesn't suit me and I seemed to be more productive in my hour than most people seemed to be in a day anyway. Maybe I should find a job that interests me and engages my mind. I've slacked off so much in the past I'm actually bored now of slacking off, in fact thinking about it, I'm going to find an interesting job!